We all have bad habits. Nobody's perfect. Especially the booger eaters.
Most everyone will agree that one of the very worst habits -- if not THE worst habit -- is cigarette smoking. Because, really, as far as poor life choices go, it's right up there with setting your DVR for "Two and a Half Men."
Nothing good can come from it.
But one horribly addicted man in Turkey is determined to quit, and he's taking his efforts to a hilarious new level. Because, after 26 years of cigarettes, Ibrahim Yucel has decided to encase his entire head in a metal cage.
And, hell, it might just work.
Though, generally speaking, that kind of self-imposed personal torture is usually best reserved for adventurous bedroom shenanigans with shady (yet willing) people you meet on Craigslist.
So I've heard.
But Yucel is serious about kicking his two-pack-a-day habit, and, as a last-ditch effort, it's all come down to the metal head cage. Which has now gone somewhat viral.
A video detailing his master plan recently surfaced on YouTube, and amazed viewers got to watch Yucel's wife literally lock him in for the day before he headed off to work. Which, despite his positive, health-conscious intentions, is a terribly misguided decision.
As someone who had to wear orthodontic headgear as a kid, I can assure you there's no glory being seen in public looking like Hannibal Lecter.
But our hero doesn't seem to care, and perhaps this low-tech solution IS the solution.
Amazingly, Yucel created the device all by himself using 130 feet of copper wire. Which, on the down side, means if he ever wears it into the wrong neighborhood, it'll be gone in less than 10 minutes.
But, until then the cage, which has only two keys that are kept by his wife and daughter, should prevent him from getting cigarettes up to his mouth, while providing just enough room for sliding in crackers and a flattened drinking straw.
Yucel is motivated by the memory of his father, who died of lung cancer, and I applaud the man for trying to quit. I wish more of you would do the same.
Not so much because I care about your health, but because my biggest pet peeve in life is when people throw their butts on the ground. It drives me crazy.
Unfortunately, even the kindest, most law-abiding citizens do it.
Apparently, at some point in history a bunch of old dudes got together to make the rules of life and officially agreed that, for whatever reason, this would not be considered litter.
"Hey, what about cigarette butts?"
"Shut up, Dan."
To me, tossing butts on the ground is a habit almost as bad as actually smoking. It's rude. It's unsightly. And it's definitely worse than booger eating.